Bedside Notes

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June 22, 3:47am
First and Second page
hierarchical, conceptual division map (computer types, languages, etc), like Stockhausen's "moments"
smaller changes turn bigger wheel incrementally
principle: smaller changes drive larger ones (Darwin: individual to species, reproduction, species to species. The same, but also different)
Physics alone cannot define existence, as it is the workings of existence that define physics.
This idea can answer sometimes "why" ("this happens because of oscillations") but not "what" ("what are the oscillations made of?), and sometimes "what" (oscillations) but not "why" ("why is shit oscillating?")
It is abstract beyond what human brains have evolved to comprehend.
Existence is: oscillation between infinitely nothing and infinitely everything. What we are and know is warm harmonics somewhere between a crest and a trough.
Scientists, academics, artists, etc, are all people trying to reverse engineer the universe - peering at ripples in the pond and watching their interaction to determine their source.
Third and Fourth page
What exists at the bottom ring? What causes these ripples?
Things repeat infinitely to smaller levels, with infinitely smaller changes (Xeno's paradox). Creating progress, like frames in a film.
existence is an oscillation between chaos (everything infinitely distinct, different) and harmony (everything is infinitely similar) [1. These must be the same: complete chaos exhibits a sort of self-similarity 2. thermodynamics will say that right now, probably forever, we proceed in the direction from 'harmony' to 'chaos']
June 29, 1:44am
Somehow I think change and observation are intertwined ["soul" is change, time allows dimension for change... does change force time into existence?]
It is free will and variable until the absolute instant of now - at the precise moment of occurrance it is predestination - a product of processes
The smallest bits define what the higher scales can do.
August 2, 1:32am
i (imaginary number) is so useful because of the quantum nature of things, just as "real" numbers are so useful because of the discrete nature of things.
October 4, 2:14am
(this was a dream) I crawled across a thin bridge, entirely over slow-moving water, almost like a bayou, with a computer. I didn't fall in (which is what I was trying to avoid)
October 14, 3:13am
First page
At the level of absolute essence there does not exist the dimensionality necessary to contain the logic of waves/patterns. Something else on top adds the dimension necessary for allowing those patterns of potential that become all things.. It would be clean if this extra "dimension" was also the cause of the waves.
What is energy?
More energy to the brain (more blood flow) means "more powerful" thought abilities, [more flip-flops.] The sum of the body's vibrations are the soul. The "stuff" is reality (the medium). The "soul" is the vibration through the stuff. [The "soul" is change ? The soul is the bottleneck on the superposition, the gradation through infinitude, Time.]
Second page
You reflect upon (affect) the universe, but it also reflects upon you, because it and you are the same thing. The same essence. You are less "soul", but it is less "universe". It is mystical and mechanical.
Third page
an organism's functions are scaled up versions (levels of repetitions, cell ---> organ ---> organ system ---> organism) of basic cellular functions - taking in, processing for energy for reproduction, excreting waste. levels up must deal with increasing levels of entropy, and dropping levels of purity. non-process waste is just something the organism evolved to deal with at larger scales.
Fourth page
What is the regulatory nature that would produce intelligence from the same process as gene replication?
November 4, 2:30am
First page
Is string theory a discrete, non-physical description of "living" influence?
Mathematics, platonic ideas, are some part of the human (at least) brain... The assembly language on top of the physical "metal" of the "real" universe... suggesting consciousness is something powerful and emergent, but still important.
String Theory is partly that program. Us. Our logic... Algebra is a step between mathematics(platonically real) and calculus(physically real). All are related and influential.
String Theory may just be some sort of emerging analytical tool for something that needs to be "not physically true" in order to be rationally, logically, calculable.
In a space that is dimensionless (a 3D space that maps onto itself), would wave (vibration) pressure be strong enough to keep waves broken down into classical entities?
Second page
[ physics: programming of "reality" { ] * [ } M-Theory: programming of (at least human) perceptive logic ]

* The "essence" of these two ideas [like "Aesthetic Breaking"**]: How and why consciousness, intellect, and non-organismic (non-DNA-propagating) choices [= perceptive programming] arose from physical laws (propagation is the key, I think) will zip together relativity with quantum physics, and string theory with philosophy, which will then be able to unite spirit and consciousness with the absolute description of existence.
** Leaving your typical style in a certain art, say, and doing something utterly different stylistically - find what both have in common. This is why The Beatles are great: they transcended style - their essence was in a spirit, a musical essence.
Move "Tool Theory" to new unification section, compare computer to universal jump-off of physics to intelligence.
Third page
That is the purpose of open neuronal jumps? What quantum effects might occur there? The midway point, the opening, is where the physical gets to intertwine with the metaphysical.
Biology, Life, Replicators ---> simple organisms ---> brain (intelligence)

the brain is something new, and while developing from the same replication process as everything else in life, it is somehow a different process with different rules.
Fourth page
Top Down Mathematics: the relationship between "fundamental math" (ie, first grade stuff) and the "real universe" is difficult to discern because that is essentially the tail end:

Omnium ---> Physics ---> M-Theory ---> Mathematics

Time allows these levels to be "built".
Through M-Theory we can discover why we are "programmed" to see quantum, non-discrete things as classical particles, as "1". (relationship of Bohr/Fibonacci 0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, etc) zero is the first natural number, from which 1 arises.
If M-Theory is the overlap between the physical/mental, then it is in fact the existential "synapse" explanation of the behavior of all universal ADSR vibrations - how spirit and matter are tied to one another. It is self-defining, just as the brain is self-wiring.
December 12, 2:48am
"We are just too stupid to see that we need everyone." - Ingrid Martin
The conception of time permeates all levels.
Time is perception, perception is time.
Ryan: What do you do when you can't use reason as a weapon?
Ingrid: Nothing. They [dumbasses] are undefeatable.
"We're still ruled by emotion, especially stupid people. Even people with great faculty of intelligence still do stupid shit because they feel like it, even when they know it's bad." - Ingrid
The difference between my idea of modernism's "conceptualism" and postmodernism's actual conceptualism: Modernism's ideas (in painting, specifically) probed the boundaries of that mode of expression to the bottom of the processes that ran it. The ideas were almost just physical (ie, mirroring reality's processes). It is still a medium of expression, however, and therefore its communication can never be perfect. The ideas will forever remain at least partially trapped.

Postmodernism ignored the media actually, despite what is said. The ideas (in this case, the execution of the works) are more driven for the sake of the concept: abstract and "feeling". The processes of the media in relation to those ideas are fundamentally overlooked. In effect, the opposite of Modernism.

What a new art will bring is a marriage of these things - thought, feeling, and idea will fit snugly within better crafted physical containers. Dense milestones of understanding can be more precisely shaped.

Expression will re-form itself. It will grow.
Chaos is a physical constant
December, Late
First page
Why these rules for how the universe behaves?
[How can intelligent observation arise from universal logic, but also delimit that logic? "Observation" might be a term that needs redefining. A rock "observes"]
universal logic (time)---> quantum logic ---> classical, physical logic ---> chemical logic ---> replication logic ---> intelligence
Second page
A the crossover of the flip-flop, the universe grows "fatter" from having to store both values at once... but they cancel, so the fatness is reduced to nothingness...?
A black hole fundamentally alters the nature of the universe, time, and gravity.

assumedly, the synapse does this as well, but on a smaller scale, in patterns scaled up to form a logic

logic must put things through the world to communicate.
All life performs flip-flop operations. They are the pin-holes poked in the curtain through which the light of the soul shines.
Third page
The mind can imagine aspects of new worlds, but not the entire thing. the mind can imagine people's behaviors, but not all of them. The idea that the brain envisions all of reality and the idea that it has nothing to do with it are both true (each person computes a "chunk" of reality).
the spirit is whim and uncertainty and improvisation. It exists outside of time. the body and physical reality are process, things changing within Time. Resolving spirit and body resolves the paradox of time and not time. Or the other way around. Expression, again, is the flip-flop.
Fourth page
The goal of life is not to propagate endlessly or necessarily more than any other species, but to be "more efficient" in their surroundings.
the computer, no matter how close it functions to actual brain-like processes [maybe it should always stay a certain degree away from brain functions. They are useful right now for the reasons that they are not like brains! They are precise, discrete, and have explicit, unfuzzy memory], it will always need to be able to do things that a brain wouldn't think to do.
"Reality" is logarithmic, not linear (or, I bet, linearity is an infinite "stacking" of logarithmic things: a line is a side of a circle, a triangle wave is a combination of sine waves) Because everything is "on" a sphere (of some sort, bending at infinity) Giving the impression of something discrete (and the discreteness then masks the infinity)
Spirit is the combination of abstract and discrete

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